6/13/2007

6/12/2007

on: liveblogging is not a crime

Coming to you live!
This college baseball haiku
is alread- [feed lost]

Ballhype: hype it up!

6/07/2007

on: skating alone

Jubilant, these Ducks,
to take the happiest lap
while Bettman fiddles

DSH is taking the day off tomorrow (gotta burn off that paid-time-off!) We'll be back on Monday.

Ballhype: hype it up!

6/06/2007

on: I like to think I've shown amazing restraint this playoff season

Cup could get lifted
tonight: good, 'cause I'm thisclose
to "knucklepuck" jokes

Ballhype: hype it up!

6/04/2007

on: Sunday is for waffles

build a dynasty,
or play in the Mouse's shadow?
Billy just woke up

Ballhype: hype it up!

6/01/2007

on: DSH loves NSB

coryza! clevis!
and more words I'll never use,
linguistic land mines

DSH hopes to get its shit together next year and find a way to get a press pass to the Bee (which, we'll admit, probably means attempting to do so earlier than one week prior). We're also a little disappointed that New Jersey couldn't keep its one-year streak of championships alive, though our congratulations certainly go to Evan O'Dorney for tackling "serrefine" and taking down the prize. (By the way, did it seem to anybody else that there were a lot of words about swords this year? Every time I looked up they were asking the kids about some implement of death or another.)

Our biggest moment of the day, though, was watching Samir Patel take his fall. We here at DSH found ourselves rooting for the kid even through an appeal that was, as Shonda Rhimes put it, a bit "icky". (I'm always a bit shocked that the Bee isn't more litigious than it is. All those parents, all those kids, reasonably direct access to the judges... I hope security is tight.) Not sure you can blame the kid's parents for taking a shot at a technicality, especially when Patel showed grace coming off the stage and taking his loss. I'm tempted to send the kid my old, worn-out, grade-school era Dan Marino jersey as a show of solidarity, except I'm not entirely sure he knows who Dan Marino is. In fact, I'm not entirely sure that most of the kids on that stage know what a football is. I do know that losing sucks, even for a Face Of The Department like Patel. Lots of bright young spellers coming up through the farm system, though, and besides, ABC can just transition him to "the agony of defeat" clips, right after the ski jumper.

But to return to "icky" for a second... are we watching the glorification of smarts or just smart-sploitation? Is the Spelling Bee a good thing? Or are we just reminding the fat kids you can get on TV by eating a lot of hot dogs? Certainly there's an argument to be made that these kids are too young for primetime pressure, but I've always thought that it comes down to the reasons the kids are getting involved. If their parents are shoving them into it, piling on the pressure, locking them in their rooms with a chair and a dictionary then yes, that's not good. Doesn't that hold true for anything? I knew plenty of Soccer Parents growing up, too, and we can agree that it's not the fault of the sport but of the overbearing moms and dads who, for whatever reason, are ruining the experience.

If it's about the kids, though, if it's about spellers going out there because they like to compete but they can't get around on a fastball... because they're more comfortable with Latin roots than jump shots (god knows I was)... because maybe they LIKE being on national TV... then I don't think we need to rest uneasy tonight because we're watching them. And playing drinking games to their misspellings. And betting on them.

Okay, maybe not betting on them.

There are a lot of kids out there who deserve to be on the cover of the newspaper for what they're accomplishing but are getting pushed out by 'roided sluggers and starlet tramps. If a euonym can get them there? Probably not the worst thing in the world.

Finally: dotted schwa! Don't mind if I do.

Update: A discussion I had with the inimitable Rob Iracane, fellow lover of all things ath-linguistic, reminded me: ESPN actually did right by the Bee this year. They were smart in going with Chris McKendry and Robin Roberts for the brunt of the play-by-play duties and leaving Mike and Mike to do the occasional commentary, on which they were solid. Even Stuart Scott managed to dial back the b-o-o-y-a-h a bit for his turn on the sidelines. You don't normally see the words "ESPN" and "restrained" together in a sentence... not outside of court documents... but their coverage of the Bee was, dare I say it, respectable?

Ballhype: hype it up!

5/31/2007

on: the shocking truth

Wait, you're telling me
Kobe wasn't supported?
Kwame wasn't it?

Ballhype: hype it up!

5/29/2007

on: obscurity in Indy

it's now Tuesday morn
and I still can't name this year's
500 winner

Ballhype: hype it up!

5/23/2007

on: the envelope please

Hello, 9-1-1?
There's a Sports Guy on my roof
I think he might jump

DSH is on vacation (a-GAIN!) We'll be back on Tuesday. If you find yourself in Dodger Stadium in Los Angeles on Saturday night, wander around the upper deck shouting "Hey! Haiku Guy!" I will buy you a beer if you can find me, loyal reader.

Ballhype: hype it up!

5/22/2007

on: things that were better six seasons ago

Things I don't care for:
VP, Chloe's kid, stuff that's
not Jack killing folks

Ballhype: hype it up!

5/21/2007

on: as an encore he'll stomp Tokyo

Orange kryptonite,
French Open concedes

Ballhype: hype it up!

5/18/2007

on: please god make this the last fucking time I read about Barbaro

Can you believe it?
Has it really been a year
since a horse got hurt?

Ballhype: hype it up!

5/15/2007

5/10/2007

on: still the only reason to like UK hoops

That would bother me, except...

DSH is out of town on Friday, May 11th. Back Monday!

Ballhype: hype it up!